Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Sleep??
Oh man, I am so torn right now. As you have read I am absolutely the happiest I have ever been, and now that I am to this enduring time in my life, ALL of those around me are stuck in some sort of rut. It truly hurts my heart to look around with this huge smile on my face and realize that I am the only one around me who is truly happy. It always seemed the opposite for me....everyone around me was happy while I was dealing with my battles, but now...it is so different. Maybe this is my way of giving back to all of those who helped me get through my hard times? I want to scream out to the world all the wonderful things happening in my life, yet I don't want to utter a word sometimes. I just truly wish these amazing people could be happy. Not just content, but truly and completely happy. I am not sure why this all just hit me right now, but it did. I have been sitting here thinking about the magnificent friends and family I have, those who have truly been my rock through it all and asked myself where each and everyone of them were in their lives. Some of course have their times of greatness but it seems as if I am the only one with no major life complaints for a change. Although this is a wonderful feeling for me to be where I am, I also want the same for everyone else. I know they will all get their someday, and that they will feel what I am feeling right now. I just hope it is sooner than later.....
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2 comments:
Awe, Mel you are the biggest sweetheart! I got a little chocked up hearing this. I know exactly what you are saying about when you are going through hard times it seems that everyone is so so happy, I'm thinking that the ones around you have to be that way to lift you up. I for one, would never dump my crappy times on you when you are going through something as well, it just makes it a lot harder to deal with. I know I got all pooey yesterday and I had to talk to you about it, but you know what, after reading this and hearing what you mean, it's not all that bad. :-) I am a happy happy person, in and out and no one will ever take that away or change it. Thank you for all you do Mel. You are the GREATEST!! I love you!
You know, I was thinking last night that you were going to feel this way... and I am so sorry! You deserve every ounce of happiness that you have right now and there is absolutely NO reason to feel bad for that!! :-) I know that you're always there for me and I won't say sorry for dumping my shit on you yesterday, cuz you'll just yell at me (LOL) but thank you soooo much! You truly are the best friend that anyone could ask for, or have in their life! I am SO SO thankful for you, and I know I'd go crazy without you in my life. You just go on with your happiness babe, and never feel bad for that again! LOVE YOU!!!!! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
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